trying

So I am trying very hard to get rid of this anger. I saw the Counselor on Thursday and asked him why it was me you abused. He asked me what your relationship was like with my brother. When I answered that you never made him go to school if he didn't want to in grade school, he'd miss weeks at a time. The counselor told me that neither one of us had a mother. You abused me and neglected Nick. You were either too selfish to care or you just weren't able to. Somehow hearing that made me feel a little better. I always looked at it that Nick got the mother that I didn't, that there was something wrong with me and that's why you abused me. That's not it, it's always been you. You weren't capable of being a mother to either of us but he doesn't even realize it. I guess I don't want to ruin that for him, I don't want to ooze my hatred into his heart.

I tried being the bigger person an having dad ask you if you wanted to see your grand kids for mothers day, you said you had to think about it. Josh calls you a few days later and you say no you don't want to see the kids because it's mothers day and Children should be with their MOTHERS.You can't slap me in the face through him, but nice try, you won't see the kids then you're missing out not me, but you're also hurting my son who asks for you and wants to spend time with you. Soon he will stop asking. Jill won't even remember you sooner or later, it's your loss.

really now

You cheated on my father yet you are wanting everyone to feel sorry for you. can you be any more fucked up? I honestly cannot believe the shit that comes out of your mouth. you are nothing but a liar, cheat and an abuser. Until your dying day you will blame the abuse you inflicted on me. WRONG. I was the child you were the adult. you were supposed to have self control.
You told me today to go on and act like i don't have a mother. well honestly that's not hard to do since i really haven't had one most of my life. You don't think you'll see your grandkids. Yep you're probably right since i need to look out for their well being and i don't want you hurting them in anyway.


Have a nice lonely life , because I am done with your shit.

WOW.

I think I could have been raised better by a pack of wolves. The one thing I learned from you is how to hate and how to read people and know when they are telling a lie since it's all you seem to do.

All the shit you put us through all the lies you told. You made me hate my dad, thinking he was such a terrible guy.

You lied about being attacked so everyone would feel sorry for you. That didn't work we all knew you were full of shit. How many things have you lied about during you life?

You have never been a mother! You are a disappointment and an embarrassment.

So

You've made no effort to see the kids since March 27th. Today you send an im to josh while he is on facebook asking to see Joey tomorrow. Ummm how about NO! If you want to see them you are going to have to make plans ahead of time. We do have a life and it sure as shit doesn't revolve around you.

You are so inconsideriate it's pathetic. When josh said no he's got plans tomorrow what about Sunday you got defensive and bitchy said some other time bye. yep way to make an effort. Good job.

the face of anger

I look in the mirror and see the face of anger.It looks back and me and has so many questions. Why did you treat me so bad. Why didn't you love me like you should have, why did you suck so bad as a mom.Why do you lie to us all. Why do you lie to your grandson. What do I tell him when you don't see him for months.
I hate you for making me feel this way. Always so alone, always so angry. Blaming me for all the abuse you inflicted on me. Are you kidding me. I was a chilld You were the adult, you were the mother. You were supposed to love and cherish me.
I don't care if you're in my life. I honestly don't want you there, I will not let you hurt MY kids though who I love and cherish above all things.